Divinely Crafty

I’m doing it. I am finally doing it.

For years, regardless of which of my passions I was immersed in, a common bit of feedback has been given to me. They like reading what I write. I’ve been told my work is well thought out, wonderfully expressed, level headed (This one makes me chuckle. If you know me well you know why.), and that I have a ‘unique voice’. Total strangers and greatly respected teachers all have expressed favorable review of the words I placed together. Each time this compliment was received I secretly glowed inside, holding my breath, not daring to breathe a whisper of how deeply I desired to be a writer. Just typing that out now – as I am on my first draft of this post – was with hesitation and a sense of vulnerable exposure. I am making my formal declaration to all who stumble upon this blog. I want to be. I am a writer. Not just as a hobby, but as a professional pursuit. I have been published in an International Magazine in an exchange for a subscription, which is worth a fair amount. But I want more. I have my sights set on cash in my account. I want to have to declare on my taxes this year that my occupation is writer!

Which brings me to the title of this post. My one word for 2008. In my scouring the web in search of guidance on how on earth to begin taking real steps towards my goals, I found The Writer Mama who has a wealth of exactly the type of information and encouragement I was seeking. I immediately added her to my reader subscriptions and look forward to more goodness from her and some guest writer mama authors. Last week she posted about her one word for 2008 and asked of her readers, “What is your word for 2008?” After much thought and debate I finally settled on the word that first came to mind, the word that has been spoken with ever beat of my heart for as long as my soul remembers…. WRITE. This is the year I write. I will write for my life, write for my soul, and write for others to read.

Tags: one word, writing

Transformation begins with a call. The myths that give context to the archetypes which arise on the hero’s journey all begin with a call. A call to the underworld of our unconscious, where a part of us has lived in shadow but now wants to be seen. Often ignored in our busy modern lives of purpose and strategy we seem almost to be able to quiet our calls until we ‘are ready’ if we even hear them at all. Yet like seeds cast off in rocky soil whose divine imperative to grow sends roots winding down around stones and gives rise to delicate shoots which emerge from heavy clay – the call persists. Our own divine imperative to grow is no less determined. Whisper or shout; pleading or demanding; extraordinary or common place. Until one day either by will or by force you answer it.

This week a call that has been growing louder and more persistent at last found its way to draw me in across the threshold and onto a new journey. I received two emails from the underworld. One from a long and established relationship and the other from someone whose existence I was not aware of – each of completely unrelated subject matter, but sharing the common effect of leading me into what will without a doubt be a significant and important transformation. The changes have already begun. I am on the journey now.
Care to join me?

Tags: journey, spirituality, transformation

Instead of writing a nostalgic New Years post taking inventory of the times past, I decided yesterday that I would start the year with a post on New Years Day about making resolutions, improving ourselves and the idea that we must always be striving to make ourselves more of something. About how we pepper our moments of awareness with ‘shoulds’ and ‘should-nots’. I made a plan that this afternoon I would take time to sit and write a substantial and well thought out post. I even made a quick start last evening and jotted down some thoughts to build on in the post. I was determined to do things differently and get the year off to a good start. So you can imagine my disappointment when I woke up this morning to full blown pain flare and fog in my brain as thick as the fog rolling along the pastures out my bedroom window (which, for your reference, was dense and heavy as it often is on cold English mornings). My first course of action was to psych myself up in order to push through with whatever energy and will I could muster. I gave myself one heck of a pep talk. Starting the year off right and all that. Because I should.

I sat at my computer with inspiring music playing, pillows to support my sore back and settled in to just do it. And I couldn’t do it. My bones ached and my thoughts mushed around in my head. Not today. This is not the day on which I will write deep thoughts about anything. It is a day, nonetheless, that I have the opportunity do things differently than I have in the past. Instead of rebuking myself for not pushing through at any cost, or pitying myself for being at the mercy of the whims of fibromyalgia’s sufferings I am surrendering with strength and grace to that which is here now. And with strength I am writing this brief hello and then will retire to my bed where I will spend the rest of the day with a cup of tea and a few select choices on the BBC iPlayer.

Happy New Year to you all, and may it hold much creativity and coping. And may we find love for all that we are, even in the messes we make.

Tags: coping, fibromyalgia, pain, self improvement