Divinely Crafty

Do you ever look at old pictures and feel as if you could just step right into that moment? Like you could round the corner and be there again?

Today I saw some pictures of our house in Portland.Well, Gladstone really. The Arlington house. I felt exactly like that.It was like you feel when you have been away from home and you imagine how it will feel like to be back home. You know the feeling? Yet it also feels so very distant from where we are now. How different our life is today than it was a few short years ago.

The changes and living that went on in that house were amazing. When we moved there I was deep in the depths of an extended and severe postpartum depression. By the time we moved out life had completely new meaning, new direction, and a vibrancy I could never have imagined. The entire family really came into its own.

The memories from that time of our lives is one of those that will never be forgotten. Celluar Memories. Ones that you feel so real in the core of your body and soul.

Tags: memories

And some days just suck.

Not sure what type of day today is yet, but yesterday was rough. The weather has been quite nice these past few days which is like a gift from the heavens to me. But of course it can’t last forever and yesterday I knew a change was coming. The weather forecast said “dry and sunny” but I knew they were wrong. My body told a different story. I could tell we were in for something big. Last night as the lightning cracked, the thunder rumbled, and the rain poured I contemplated that maybe I should reconsider my profession. I could hire myself out to the weather channel as an expert resource. What do you think? Only problem is that if I ever were lucky enough to get a handle on this mess of an illness I would do myself out of a job. … Now there’s a dilemma I could get into!

So yes, this is a whiny post. I deserve to whine every now and then don’t I? I go on call for 2 births starting tomorrow. Clients due on the 27th and the 2nd. Days like yesterday and today worry me though. I can’t take the heavy duty pain meds when on call for obvious reasons but then it becomes a matter of whether or not I can physically deal with attending a labor. One of those catch-22 things I guess. And a great motivator to keep searching for an answer.I know there has to be one.

Tags: coping, fatigue, fibromyalgia, pain

I am going to be thritysomething for the last time in a couple months. I have lived on my own for over 20 years. Yet here it is, one day before my parents visit from America and I am freaking out so much about the state of my house that I made myself sick to my stomach this morning. Seriously. I am a basket case. I didn’t sleep much last night and woke up good and grouchy this morning. I warned the family that I get twitchy before my parents visit, which they all know well from experience, and I think I did a smashing job of delaying the extreme twitch until today, just one day before they arrive. But now the freak is on and I am a cleaning fool. Must. Look. Good. For. Inspection.

Seeking enlightenment through artistry. Is she serious? Is that supposed to be witty?

Why, yes. It is. Serious and witty. I mean it, but I also know better than to take myself too seriously.

My creative expression is a vital part of my existence. I rarely feel as good as I do when I am freely expressing myself through some form of artistry. It helps me sort it out. Thus the category for posts like this one: Sorting It Out. Words, Art,Craft,Food,Nature,Music,Family,Birth…my artistry is my life. I cannot think of one aspect of living that doesn’t connect with creation alongside growth. Its not all joy, its not all suffering. Each is connected in its own way.

And its fun. and cool. cuz I don’t want to grow up.

Serious and witty.